I think the hardest thing in the world for me to do is accept help from others.
There are rare times when I find myself in a jam and have to ask for help, and I'm ok with that. It's the times that I know I can handle something, and I get help with it anyway that bother me.
Like today. I have a very large yard. I also have a very small mower... but it was in my budget so it makes me proud. I have my own little mower and my very own large yard to keep mowed. I like this. It makes me happy. However, due to the ever changing weather, and a baseball schedule to work around I hadn't gotten to the mowing yet. but I was going to... this week. I'd made plans to.
But I got home today and my very sweet and generous eldery neighbor had mowed it for me.
My first reaction was to burst into tears because I'm a failure.
Why can't I just be grateful for the help?
I have a very stubborn, independent nature. I've gotten pretty good at taking care of just about anything I need around here. Now I feel like I'm indebted to them. I don't like that feeling. The silly thing is that I would help my neighbors with anything they need without expecting a single thing in return. Yet I cringe at the thought of them helping me.
It just makes me feel like a charity case, and that bothers me.
I just wish I could see these acts as ones of kindness rather than charity, and just be thankful for them.
I think I'll go make them some cookies.
You're just like me....too independent. We need to relax and let people help us more.
ReplyDeleteThe obviously wouldn't do it if they didn't want too.
Take care and have a wonderful week!
Just think of the blessing he got for mowing for you.
ReplyDelete