Monday, April 22, 2013

Blessed

When I first went to name this post, my first thought was "Lucky"..... But I'm not where I am today because of luck. I am blessed beyond measure by God.



I was blessed to be born into the most wonderful family. I was blessed to have an upbringing that prepared me for what my life has become. My Mother always told my sister and I growing up that, no matter what, we need to be prepared for the worst. We needed to get our education and establish a career that would support us in case the unthinkable happened. Which I'm sure at the time she was thinking of the death of a spouse, but the unthinkable is anything that leaves us supporting ourlesves. I would love to be able to stay at home with my kids, and maybe that will still be possible one day. But for now I am blessed to be able to provide for them.

I am blessed to have two children that are the lights of my life. I focus my thoughts on the fact that if I had never married who I did, I would not have gotten the boys that I have. They are a part of me and a part of him, and with that combination they are who they are, and that is something I would never want to change. I am blessed that I get to have them most of the time and raise them and discipline them the way they need. They are much better kids after this past year. I'm not a perfect Mom, by any means, but kids need discipline and structure. They will always do better in that environment.

But most of all I'm blessed by what happened. I made my vows to him almost 12 years ago, and I would've lived by my vows till my dying day. But unfortunately, I had made my vows to someone that turned into someone else. I really dislike the saying "people change", it's overused and sounds like an excuse. But honestly, that is what happened. He started to let the devil in and over time he changed in ever aspect of his life. He's not a good person anymore. He's not who I met and fell in love with so many years ago. The way things were before out house burned were not good. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place. I knew how I should be living my life, but I wasn't able to and still be a supportive wife.

I know there are people out in the world that are in the same situation I was in... and much, much worse I'm afraid. I feel like God removed me from my bad situation in order to make a better life for me and my boys. I didn't deserve it. But I got it. I got a second chance.

How did I get so lucky?

I didn't, I was blessed.

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