The more I think about it, the more I actually LIKE the idea of having donuts as the wedding cake!
Now, just hear me out for a minute...
Donuts are round. You know what else is round? Rings! See, I'm not so crazy after all! There is so much symbolism when it comes to circles and weddings. Ahh, the joy of unending love.
I bet I could come up with a really cool way to make a donut wedding cake. And it would be so sweet to have little donut holes there for the kids, and for David and I to feed each other.
Call me crazy, but this sounds like a really fun idea. :)
Thursday, February 27, 2014
Wednesday, February 26, 2014
The calm before the storm
I went to lunch with two of my girlfriends from church today. They were asking how everything was going, how the boys were adjusting to the idea of moving, etc, etc. Then one of them asked me how I was doing with all the changes coming...
And I thought about it, and realized I'm in a situation that would normally completely stress me out... in fact, it would push me over the edge.
But it hasn't...
I'm calm.
Extremely calm.
When I answered her, I knew exactly why I was calm. The Lord has given me peace. Peace in my upcoming marriage. Peace about moving to a new state. Peace in completely changing everything in my whole life. That's right, just about everything I call normal right now will change. I'll even be changing my job title. I'm going from working full time to being a stay at home mom. I actually think of all the changes that one scares me the most. But even then, I'm at peace with it, and I'm looking forward to it.
It's now just shy of four months till the wedding and I have very little actually planned for it. I could see my girlfriends stressing out when I told them this. But not me. I'm as cool as a cucumber. I know it will all come together eventually, and if for some reason I do forget something major, like the cake, it'll be okay. It won't keep us from getting married. If that happens I'll just grab a few boxes of donuts on the way to the church and we'll still have a grand old time.
And at the end of the day I'll still be married to the love of my life, and that's the most important thing.
I'm not worried.
Everything can go wrong, but if I'm there and he's there then it will all be perfect.
It's the calm before the storm... but not a bad storm... Changes are coming. Adjustments are coming. It will be a storm of a lot of things happening all at once. But I know that the Lord will guide us every step of the way.
And I thought about it, and realized I'm in a situation that would normally completely stress me out... in fact, it would push me over the edge.
But it hasn't...
I'm calm.
Extremely calm.
When I answered her, I knew exactly why I was calm. The Lord has given me peace. Peace in my upcoming marriage. Peace about moving to a new state. Peace in completely changing everything in my whole life. That's right, just about everything I call normal right now will change. I'll even be changing my job title. I'm going from working full time to being a stay at home mom. I actually think of all the changes that one scares me the most. But even then, I'm at peace with it, and I'm looking forward to it.
It's now just shy of four months till the wedding and I have very little actually planned for it. I could see my girlfriends stressing out when I told them this. But not me. I'm as cool as a cucumber. I know it will all come together eventually, and if for some reason I do forget something major, like the cake, it'll be okay. It won't keep us from getting married. If that happens I'll just grab a few boxes of donuts on the way to the church and we'll still have a grand old time.
And at the end of the day I'll still be married to the love of my life, and that's the most important thing.
I'm not worried.
Everything can go wrong, but if I'm there and he's there then it will all be perfect.
It's the calm before the storm... but not a bad storm... Changes are coming. Adjustments are coming. It will be a storm of a lot of things happening all at once. But I know that the Lord will guide us every step of the way.
Saturday, February 8, 2014
The story of us
I've been wanting to write about how David and I got together for a few reasons:
1. It is an opportunity to write about how amazing the Lord is and was when it came to getting us together.
2. I want to get down all the details now before they are just a memory.
3. So our children can go back and read about our story long after we've gone.
Our story begins in August of 2012...
The third weekend in August is the annual Rich Mountain Association in Arkansas. I'd heard of it, but had never been to it before. David, on the other hand was a regular to the association. I'd heard it was coming up, and I really thought it would be a good opportunity to get out and meet people. Looking back now, I know it was the Lord giving me the conviction to be there.
While there, I heard David preach for the first time. I'd never heard of him before that weekend. I knew of two of his brothers and his dad, but not him. All it took was hearing him preach one time, and I was completely captivated by him. I couldn't explain it. I was just drawn to him. I didn't know anything about him, so I just assumed he was married - which he was at the time. So to be drawn to him as much as I was, was something I couldn't explain.
When I got home from that meeting, I looked for him on Facebook. He was easy to find, and I was happy to see that he had over 1,000 friends. I knew that if he had that many friends, then it wouldn't be weird for me to 'friend' him. So I did, and he accepted not having a clue who I was. For the next six months I would read his posts, and continue to be intrigued by the things that he would write.
But in February of 2013 he had a post that not only made me hurt for him, but it made me really want to get to know him better. He posted about the divorce between him and his wife.
My first thought was: "Yes, I'm not the only one!!"
I wanted to see him again, I wanted to know his story, and I really just wanted an opportunity to talk to him about being a divorced Primitive Baptist.
About a month later I started hearing announcements that he was going to be at a meeting in our area in April. I knew without a doubt I had to be at that entire meeting, and somehow find a way to talk to him. But I'm so painfully shy around new people I didn't know how that would happen.
After the Saturday afternoon service of that meeting I still hadn't gotten the nerve to approach him. But the Lord took over and made it happen for me. Little did I know someone had told David that he should talk to me, only they didn't tell him why. I just happened to be walking around the back side of the building talking on the phone to my sister, when he started past me. He stopped, pointed at me, and said: "I want to talk to you." In a matter of seconds I told my sister I had to go, and I immediately told David that I wanted to talk to him too.
I introduced myself, and he remembered my name from being friends with me on Facebook. For the next half hour we shared our stories and bonded over the nearly identical situations we had just gone through. It was uncanny how alike our stories were. And it was also refreshing to see how easily we talked to each other. My fascination with him was growing.
In the weeks following that meeting I found myself in a bad situation. I was being tempted by a man in the world... a bad man... and couldn't find an escape from him. This was a low point in my existence, and I knew the devil was playing on my loneliness. I was tempted, and I was interested in dating this person. It was not a good situation. I would pray every night for an escape from him, and wake up every morning wanting to hear from him. I had a split personality, and all I wanted was to get away from him. Thankfully in early May, for some unknown reason, the man stopped talking to me. To this day I don't know why, I don't know what I did, but I've thanked the Lord for it ever since. The Lord provided my escape. The Lord knew I was too weak to handle it on my own, and He took pity on me in my horrible state.
After that terrible man was out of my life, I had one thought in my head. David. I needed to talk to David. I didn't know why, but I had to. The Lord was leading me to him again. We hadn't talked since the meeting back in April, but I sent him a message on Facebook to see how he was doing. We talked a little, and caught up on how we were doing. He then informed me that he was in a relationship and it was getting serious. I was crushed. Up until that moment I didn't even know I was interested in him romantically. I just knew I was drawn to him, and that we were going through similar situations. So, needless to say, my feeling of sadness surprised me.
Over the summer and fall we saw each other at a few meetings and would talk briefly on Facebook to keep in touch, and that fall I jumped at an opportunity to help him out. He was working on a new song book for the church, and was having trouble with some of the pages. It just so happened, the help he was needing was something I do in my job on a daily basis. It would be no problem for me to do what he was needing. Our talking increased because of the book, and our friendship was growing.
Around October he started telling me that it wasn't going very good with the woman he was seeing. My first concern was to be there for my friend, and to listen. But deep down in me somewhere, I started to get my hopes up. A few weeks after that they broke up. I continued to be there for him through his heartbreak, even though it was breaking my heart at the same time. But the more we talked, the more our relationship took off, and the rest is history. Looking back now we can both see the Lord working in our lives, in different ways, but leading us to each other.
There were many complications that stood in the way of us being together because of the way things stood with my boys' dad, so the cards were stacked against us. The probability of us actually being able to get married and be together were slim. But no problem is too big for the Lord. He has helped us overcome every obstacle that was put before us.
The Lord brought us together, and we continue to be amazed at how well suited we are for one another. Our Love has grown into something of fairy tales.
However, we know we aren't the product of a fairy tale.... we are a product of the Lord's will.
1. It is an opportunity to write about how amazing the Lord is and was when it came to getting us together.
2. I want to get down all the details now before they are just a memory.
3. So our children can go back and read about our story long after we've gone.
Our story begins in August of 2012...
The third weekend in August is the annual Rich Mountain Association in Arkansas. I'd heard of it, but had never been to it before. David, on the other hand was a regular to the association. I'd heard it was coming up, and I really thought it would be a good opportunity to get out and meet people. Looking back now, I know it was the Lord giving me the conviction to be there.
While there, I heard David preach for the first time. I'd never heard of him before that weekend. I knew of two of his brothers and his dad, but not him. All it took was hearing him preach one time, and I was completely captivated by him. I couldn't explain it. I was just drawn to him. I didn't know anything about him, so I just assumed he was married - which he was at the time. So to be drawn to him as much as I was, was something I couldn't explain.
When I got home from that meeting, I looked for him on Facebook. He was easy to find, and I was happy to see that he had over 1,000 friends. I knew that if he had that many friends, then it wouldn't be weird for me to 'friend' him. So I did, and he accepted not having a clue who I was. For the next six months I would read his posts, and continue to be intrigued by the things that he would write.
But in February of 2013 he had a post that not only made me hurt for him, but it made me really want to get to know him better. He posted about the divorce between him and his wife.
My first thought was: "Yes, I'm not the only one!!"
I wanted to see him again, I wanted to know his story, and I really just wanted an opportunity to talk to him about being a divorced Primitive Baptist.
About a month later I started hearing announcements that he was going to be at a meeting in our area in April. I knew without a doubt I had to be at that entire meeting, and somehow find a way to talk to him. But I'm so painfully shy around new people I didn't know how that would happen.
After the Saturday afternoon service of that meeting I still hadn't gotten the nerve to approach him. But the Lord took over and made it happen for me. Little did I know someone had told David that he should talk to me, only they didn't tell him why. I just happened to be walking around the back side of the building talking on the phone to my sister, when he started past me. He stopped, pointed at me, and said: "I want to talk to you." In a matter of seconds I told my sister I had to go, and I immediately told David that I wanted to talk to him too.
I introduced myself, and he remembered my name from being friends with me on Facebook. For the next half hour we shared our stories and bonded over the nearly identical situations we had just gone through. It was uncanny how alike our stories were. And it was also refreshing to see how easily we talked to each other. My fascination with him was growing.
In the weeks following that meeting I found myself in a bad situation. I was being tempted by a man in the world... a bad man... and couldn't find an escape from him. This was a low point in my existence, and I knew the devil was playing on my loneliness. I was tempted, and I was interested in dating this person. It was not a good situation. I would pray every night for an escape from him, and wake up every morning wanting to hear from him. I had a split personality, and all I wanted was to get away from him. Thankfully in early May, for some unknown reason, the man stopped talking to me. To this day I don't know why, I don't know what I did, but I've thanked the Lord for it ever since. The Lord provided my escape. The Lord knew I was too weak to handle it on my own, and He took pity on me in my horrible state.
After that terrible man was out of my life, I had one thought in my head. David. I needed to talk to David. I didn't know why, but I had to. The Lord was leading me to him again. We hadn't talked since the meeting back in April, but I sent him a message on Facebook to see how he was doing. We talked a little, and caught up on how we were doing. He then informed me that he was in a relationship and it was getting serious. I was crushed. Up until that moment I didn't even know I was interested in him romantically. I just knew I was drawn to him, and that we were going through similar situations. So, needless to say, my feeling of sadness surprised me.
Over the summer and fall we saw each other at a few meetings and would talk briefly on Facebook to keep in touch, and that fall I jumped at an opportunity to help him out. He was working on a new song book for the church, and was having trouble with some of the pages. It just so happened, the help he was needing was something I do in my job on a daily basis. It would be no problem for me to do what he was needing. Our talking increased because of the book, and our friendship was growing.
Around October he started telling me that it wasn't going very good with the woman he was seeing. My first concern was to be there for my friend, and to listen. But deep down in me somewhere, I started to get my hopes up. A few weeks after that they broke up. I continued to be there for him through his heartbreak, even though it was breaking my heart at the same time. But the more we talked, the more our relationship took off, and the rest is history. Looking back now we can both see the Lord working in our lives, in different ways, but leading us to each other.
There were many complications that stood in the way of us being together because of the way things stood with my boys' dad, so the cards were stacked against us. The probability of us actually being able to get married and be together were slim. But no problem is too big for the Lord. He has helped us overcome every obstacle that was put before us.
The Lord brought us together, and we continue to be amazed at how well suited we are for one another. Our Love has grown into something of fairy tales.
However, we know we aren't the product of a fairy tale.... we are a product of the Lord's will.
Thursday, February 6, 2014
It's all downhill from here....
"Ok, mom, so how is this going to work? When exactly are we moving?"
"So when we come up here to see Daddy, will we get to see everyone at church too?"
"Mommy, if our electricity goes out during the ice storm can we just go to San Antonio for a few days?"
"We're going to finally live on a cul de sac??? Awesome!!!"
"I bet the temperature in San Antonio is a lot warmer than here... that will be great!"
"So does San Antonio have little league football?"
These are just a few of the many questions and statements Jaxon has made over the past two weeks. Acceptance has arrived. The past two weeks started out rough, but praying non-stop for my child (by me and so many others) has helped him over the hump. The Lord is so amazing! I thank Him everyday for the progress Jaxon has made with the changes. Wow. I didn't hardly have time to worry about how he would handle the news... the Lord blessed him, and he's going to be just fine.
I am truly speechless with what God has done...
All I can say is: Thank you Lord!
And thank you all for the prayers for my child!
Now for the easy one.... I have to tell my youngest son this week so I can get the house up for sale soon. I'm not expecting it to be as bad as his brother, but I don't think it will be a cake walk either... I'm not worried, though, I know that God will bless him too.
The tough part is over.
It really is downhill from here.
"So when we come up here to see Daddy, will we get to see everyone at church too?"
"Mommy, if our electricity goes out during the ice storm can we just go to San Antonio for a few days?"
"We're going to finally live on a cul de sac??? Awesome!!!"
"I bet the temperature in San Antonio is a lot warmer than here... that will be great!"
"So does San Antonio have little league football?"
These are just a few of the many questions and statements Jaxon has made over the past two weeks. Acceptance has arrived. The past two weeks started out rough, but praying non-stop for my child (by me and so many others) has helped him over the hump. The Lord is so amazing! I thank Him everyday for the progress Jaxon has made with the changes. Wow. I didn't hardly have time to worry about how he would handle the news... the Lord blessed him, and he's going to be just fine.
I am truly speechless with what God has done...
All I can say is: Thank you Lord!
And thank you all for the prayers for my child!
Now for the easy one.... I have to tell my youngest son this week so I can get the house up for sale soon. I'm not expecting it to be as bad as his brother, but I don't think it will be a cake walk either... I'm not worried, though, I know that God will bless him too.
The tough part is over.
It really is downhill from here.
Friday, January 31, 2014
Love is in the air.....
With February fast approaching I've been thinking a lot about love. (The gorgeous ring on my hand might have something to do with that too.) I could go on and on about how wonderful my fiance is and how much I love him, but I will spare you all that mushiness. I will, however, share all the other lovey dovey thoughts that might not make you as physically ill.
I'm really in awe of what happens when you pray about what you want instead of trying to go after something on your own. My fiance and I both tried to force relationships with other people because we didn't want to be alone. Needless to say both of those ideas blew up in our faces. We agreed early on to constantly pray about our relationship to make sure it was of the Lord and not of ourselves, and the more we prayed the more confident we both became that it was right. The more we got to know each other, the more we realized he was my missing piece, and I was his. We complete each other - that's the best and worst movie line ever, by the way - but it's totally true. I never knew two people could fit together as well as we do. We have each said on more than one occasion that we now know what everyone else is talking about. We now know what blissfully in love people feel like. It's a feeling that is indescribable. Or as he and I like to joke - all the silly love songs finally make sense!
Wow, the Lord really knew what he was doing when he paired us up. But that's no surprise. He is all knowing. He provided opportunities for us to meet and get to know each other, as well as providing the necessary paths for me and the boys to move to his state, which was no easy task as far as we were concerned. But the Lord made it happen, and made it look easy. Now we wonder why we worried about it so much. When things fall into place like that, it's very easy to see that he and I are meant for each other. It's the Lord's will, and it is coming to pass.
I won't be able to see my sweetie on Valentine's Day, but it's ok. I will see him soon after. All I need on that day is to hear him tell me how much he loves me, like he does every single day. We never miss an opportunity to say I love you, and every time I hear it, it feels like the very first time. It's amazing.
Finally knowing what it feels like to love and be loved is the most amazing feeling in the world.
Love IS the greatest thing, this world has ever known.
P. S. I did get a little bit mushy, and I apologize... I'll just use my one get out of jail free card on this one.
I'm really in awe of what happens when you pray about what you want instead of trying to go after something on your own. My fiance and I both tried to force relationships with other people because we didn't want to be alone. Needless to say both of those ideas blew up in our faces. We agreed early on to constantly pray about our relationship to make sure it was of the Lord and not of ourselves, and the more we prayed the more confident we both became that it was right. The more we got to know each other, the more we realized he was my missing piece, and I was his. We complete each other - that's the best and worst movie line ever, by the way - but it's totally true. I never knew two people could fit together as well as we do. We have each said on more than one occasion that we now know what everyone else is talking about. We now know what blissfully in love people feel like. It's a feeling that is indescribable. Or as he and I like to joke - all the silly love songs finally make sense!
Wow, the Lord really knew what he was doing when he paired us up. But that's no surprise. He is all knowing. He provided opportunities for us to meet and get to know each other, as well as providing the necessary paths for me and the boys to move to his state, which was no easy task as far as we were concerned. But the Lord made it happen, and made it look easy. Now we wonder why we worried about it so much. When things fall into place like that, it's very easy to see that he and I are meant for each other. It's the Lord's will, and it is coming to pass.
I won't be able to see my sweetie on Valentine's Day, but it's ok. I will see him soon after. All I need on that day is to hear him tell me how much he loves me, like he does every single day. We never miss an opportunity to say I love you, and every time I hear it, it feels like the very first time. It's amazing.
Finally knowing what it feels like to love and be loved is the most amazing feeling in the world.
Love IS the greatest thing, this world has ever known.
P. S. I did get a little bit mushy, and I apologize... I'll just use my one get out of jail free card on this one.
Tuesday, January 28, 2014
And now..... the rest of the story.
I have a secret.
A few people know what it is, but most of you do not.
According to the dates of my blog, it looks like I started my blog on March 20th, 2013. The truth is, it started about two months prior to that....
So in the words of Paul Harvey: It's time for...rest of the story....
I had this old craft blog I started back in 2009, but since the house burned I hadn't done anything with it. I somehow decided that I should delete everything craft related and use it to get out some of my frustrations about my divorce. I wrote daily! I had so many things I wanted to get off my chest. I thought I needed to clear the air about what happened. I wanted everyone to know that I fought for my marriage, and that he was the one that left. There were some posts that were worse than others... one in particular I remember was named "She can keep him". Boy did I go through some bitter times.
But then I changed my tune - actually I received a swift kick in the rear end. I heard a sermon that made me delete everything I had written up to that point. It was a sermon that I knew without a doubt was just for me. I know this, because the minister who preached it had just recently found my blog. The sermon was about controlling our anger, and not letting the devil temp us to wrath. Ouch. My toes were not only being stepped on, they were being beaten with a hammer!
What had gotten into me?
What made me think I could vent my frustrations for the world to see??
The answer is simple. It was the devil. I thought I was so strong, and that I could fight off the devil from any direction, and he found his way in the back door. He made me believe that it was ok for me to write things like that. I wanted so badly to be normal again and to fit in with the crowd. I just wanted people to see that I hadn't done anything wrong, and that it was all my ex-husband's fault.
But you know what? Everyone already knew that. No, I didn't do everything right when it came to my marriage. I know I should've done things different and better. But as far as the the blame, I didn't need to profess my innocence. That was something that needed to be told simply by the way I carried myself. I needed to make sure my speech was kind and my actions were upstanding. And that's it.
And as far as my venting is concerned, all that did was bring about more anger and bitterness. It fueled the fire I was trying to put out. All I did was sit around and think of more things to gripe about, and I couldn't see what it was doing to me.
After I deleted my entire blog - about 30+ posts - I didn't feel like I should write anymore. I was embarrassed. So instead I started to pray about it. I felt like I had found my voice, and that there could possibly be some good that could come out of me sharing my story, but how do I do it? How do I talk about something that brings about so much anger without getting mad?
I felt impressed to write a couple of posts that didn't have anything to do with my situation just to keep things going. Then slowly I started to explore writing about my story in a positive way, and that is when I met someone who would completely change my attitude about my situation. In my post titled It is well, I wrote about a minister I met that was in my same exact situation. He helped me realize that what I had been though was actually a blessing, and that it was ok for me to be happy about what had happened. Up until that point I felt I should mope and gripe about poor pitiful me and what I had been through, when the truth is I should be thanking God for helping me escape from the horrible place I was in, and helping me get to a much better place.
...and just for an added tidbit of interest, I'm now engaged to that minister.
What I learned by changing my attitude is that the more thankful I was for the Lord's help, the less anger I had. I still pray about my blog and the things that I write on here. I pray that whatever I say, the Lord is glorified. My situation is becoming more and more common these days, and if I can help just one person out there get through their anger, and get to a place of thankfulness, then it was worth it.
So there it is... my secret is out.
And now you know.... the rest of the story....
GOOD DAY!
A few people know what it is, but most of you do not.
According to the dates of my blog, it looks like I started my blog on March 20th, 2013. The truth is, it started about two months prior to that....
So in the words of Paul Harvey: It's time for...rest of the story....
I had this old craft blog I started back in 2009, but since the house burned I hadn't done anything with it. I somehow decided that I should delete everything craft related and use it to get out some of my frustrations about my divorce. I wrote daily! I had so many things I wanted to get off my chest. I thought I needed to clear the air about what happened. I wanted everyone to know that I fought for my marriage, and that he was the one that left. There were some posts that were worse than others... one in particular I remember was named "She can keep him". Boy did I go through some bitter times.
But then I changed my tune - actually I received a swift kick in the rear end. I heard a sermon that made me delete everything I had written up to that point. It was a sermon that I knew without a doubt was just for me. I know this, because the minister who preached it had just recently found my blog. The sermon was about controlling our anger, and not letting the devil temp us to wrath. Ouch. My toes were not only being stepped on, they were being beaten with a hammer!
What had gotten into me?
What made me think I could vent my frustrations for the world to see??
The answer is simple. It was the devil. I thought I was so strong, and that I could fight off the devil from any direction, and he found his way in the back door. He made me believe that it was ok for me to write things like that. I wanted so badly to be normal again and to fit in with the crowd. I just wanted people to see that I hadn't done anything wrong, and that it was all my ex-husband's fault.
But you know what? Everyone already knew that. No, I didn't do everything right when it came to my marriage. I know I should've done things different and better. But as far as the the blame, I didn't need to profess my innocence. That was something that needed to be told simply by the way I carried myself. I needed to make sure my speech was kind and my actions were upstanding. And that's it.
And as far as my venting is concerned, all that did was bring about more anger and bitterness. It fueled the fire I was trying to put out. All I did was sit around and think of more things to gripe about, and I couldn't see what it was doing to me.
After I deleted my entire blog - about 30+ posts - I didn't feel like I should write anymore. I was embarrassed. So instead I started to pray about it. I felt like I had found my voice, and that there could possibly be some good that could come out of me sharing my story, but how do I do it? How do I talk about something that brings about so much anger without getting mad?
I felt impressed to write a couple of posts that didn't have anything to do with my situation just to keep things going. Then slowly I started to explore writing about my story in a positive way, and that is when I met someone who would completely change my attitude about my situation. In my post titled It is well, I wrote about a minister I met that was in my same exact situation. He helped me realize that what I had been though was actually a blessing, and that it was ok for me to be happy about what had happened. Up until that point I felt I should mope and gripe about poor pitiful me and what I had been through, when the truth is I should be thanking God for helping me escape from the horrible place I was in, and helping me get to a much better place.
...and just for an added tidbit of interest, I'm now engaged to that minister.
What I learned by changing my attitude is that the more thankful I was for the Lord's help, the less anger I had. I still pray about my blog and the things that I write on here. I pray that whatever I say, the Lord is glorified. My situation is becoming more and more common these days, and if I can help just one person out there get through their anger, and get to a place of thankfulness, then it was worth it.
So there it is... my secret is out.
And now you know.... the rest of the story....
GOOD DAY!
Sunday, January 26, 2014
But joy cometh in the morning
For his anger endureth but a moment; in his favour is life: weeping may endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning. Psalm 30:5
Tonight I am thanking the Lord for his help once more.
I told my oldest son tonight that we will be moving to a new state after the wedding. We talked, there were many tears by both of us, and I held him till he fell asleep. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I broke my child's heart.
I know it's going to get worse before it gets better. But it will get better. I have faith that it will. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it is the light of a new and wonderful life for me, the man I love, and our crazy mess of boys. The Lord is guiding us toward that light, and I know everything will be ok. Actually, it will be more than ok. It will be amazing.
One more hurdle has been cleared. And even though I know there will be more hurdles ahead of us I'm thankful I won't have to jump them alone. I have the most amazing man by my side - maybe not physically since he lives 500 miles away - but mentally and emotionally and spiritually he is with me every step of the way. I also have my Lord with me. I can go to Him day or night and He helps me. Together we make a threefold cord.... and as the scripture says, a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
This is what I need. This is what I've been waiting my whole life for. It was an odd, windy road of misery and broken hearts, but I know I'm exactly where I need to be now. We are climbing this mountain together, and even though it won't be easy, the view when we get to the top will be totally worth it.
So even though there is weeping tonight, I know it won't last. Joy cometh in the morning. Maybe not tomorrow morning, and maybe not in two mornings, but soon. I can feel it.
Tonight I am thanking the Lord for his help once more.
I told my oldest son tonight that we will be moving to a new state after the wedding. We talked, there were many tears by both of us, and I held him till he fell asleep. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I broke my child's heart.
I know it's going to get worse before it gets better. But it will get better. I have faith that it will. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it is the light of a new and wonderful life for me, the man I love, and our crazy mess of boys. The Lord is guiding us toward that light, and I know everything will be ok. Actually, it will be more than ok. It will be amazing.
One more hurdle has been cleared. And even though I know there will be more hurdles ahead of us I'm thankful I won't have to jump them alone. I have the most amazing man by my side - maybe not physically since he lives 500 miles away - but mentally and emotionally and spiritually he is with me every step of the way. I also have my Lord with me. I can go to Him day or night and He helps me. Together we make a threefold cord.... and as the scripture says, a threefold cord is not quickly broken.
This is what I need. This is what I've been waiting my whole life for. It was an odd, windy road of misery and broken hearts, but I know I'm exactly where I need to be now. We are climbing this mountain together, and even though it won't be easy, the view when we get to the top will be totally worth it.
So even though there is weeping tonight, I know it won't last. Joy cometh in the morning. Maybe not tomorrow morning, and maybe not in two mornings, but soon. I can feel it.
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